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How To Get The Best From Your Inner Teenager | BABH S1Ep19

season 1 Feb 04, 2020

EPISODE 19: How To Get The Best From Your Inner Teenager

Tomorrow (Feb 5th 2020) NPA turns 13 years old and becomes a 'teenager'!

As the Custodian, or 'Father' of NPA I've often likened it to a child - with it's own journey, gifts and path - and with that in mind, like any parent, the arrival of the teenage years come with a little trepidation about what kind of teenager it's going to be ☺️

I picked today's topic with that in mind, and while you've likely heard about and/or done some inner child work, have you ever thought specifically about your inner teenager? 

All adults have 'teenage moments'. So in this episode we talk about the gifts, the challenges and how to get the best from your inner teenager.


NPA BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION SALE

For just a few days and to celebrate NPA turning 13, I'm opening The NPA Advanced Training online programme for those of you who would like to be a Beta-Tester and get in now at a greatly reduced price.

Sale opens Wed 5th Feb 2020 at 9am 
Sale ends Fri 7th Feb 2020 at Midnight

CLICK HERE FOR DETAILS AND TO BUY


NOTES:

Hallmarks of The Teenager

Individuation/Rebellion 

  • Teenager as developmental stage
  • Urge to "fly the nest", becoming something new
  • Importance of peers (friends) in individuation
  • Questioning what’s been accepted as normal

Puberty

  • Closing of the thousand eyes & the chrysalis phenomenon
  • You have to cut off from the old to be able to hear the new
  • Development of sexual maturity: Shame/secrecy/ownership
  • Physical changes, body image, the changing form.

Looking for independence and empowerment

  • Facilitation, give them a job
  • The gift of innocence (lack of experience can be freedom from limitations)
  • The need for adult mentorship - finding an inspiring role model

The Teenage Phase

Q: How do you know when your inner teenager is active?
A: Any time you start rebelling against the status quo (the way it’s always been)

It's a sign you are ‘outgrowing’ something that’s been established for some time.

Think transition and seeking maturity - the teenage phase is where you are no longer a child, not yet an adult.

It can be helpful to identify - what is the parent energy - what is the energy this part of you ‘grew up in’

The ‘parent’ will likely be the gatekeeper, controller and has potential to be the a positive role in the transformation - work with both.

The 'Parent' part needs to let go - let the teenager explore and make their own mistakes. The parent's concern, that the world will come down or ‘losing them’ - is highly unlikely.

When You Hit A Teenage Phase Remember:

  • There are many areas of life where we hit that teenage phase
  • Good to learn from and apply the best aspects of that stage of the journey
    acknowledge it as signal for transition and growth - rebellion becomes the hero’s journey
  • Find peers that are on the same journey
  • Don’t expect yourself to have all the answers in the middle of the process - just trust the impulse to move forward
  • Respect your need to take time to explore the newness that’s emerging before you thrust it out into the world
  • Practice handing the reigns over to that inner teenager - trust the innocence of that part of you and the gift of its ability to explore without the rules and limitations that are the hallmark of the old status quo.

LINKS MENTIONED IN THE SHOW

Get on the Boundary Bootcamp waitlist

1:1 Sessions with Joel


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