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The Myth Of Unity | Why It Creates Conflict & A New Model For Relationship | BABH S1Ep74

season 1 Mar 02, 2021

EPISODE 74: The Myth Of Unity | Why It Creates Conflict (& A New Model For Relationship)

In this episode I'm sharing a section of a live class that reveals the 2 strategies that are at the core of most relational conflict.

You'll find out what's at the heart of those strategies and discover a new model for relationship that points the way to a conflict free life!

So click that play button and let’s get into it!

You can watch this episode with visuals from the class on you tube HERE

Are you interested in the live event?

I'm considering doing a live, online event where you'll learn the practical tools that come out of this relational model. Whether it's conflict with others, inner conflict or issues that come up for you when those around you are in conflict, this event will give you the keys to inner peace, harmony and resolution.

Let me know your interest by emailing me directly at [email protected] 


Episode Bullet Points:

  • The nature of Duality
    - Duality is a paradigm of "This OR That", either/or.
    - At its core 'My way is the right way'
    - Inherently conflictual
    - But you must have 2 before relating can begin at all
    - False strategies seek to go backwards to unity to resolve the conflict (see below)
    - The universe is expanding - forward motion takes us to Triality: the acknowledgement of the relational space as a distict third party. (See below)

  • The myth of Unity
    - When there is only one there is no relating. Relating requires more than one.
    - Trying to 'become one' inevitably fails as is requires the extinction of all but one.
    - UNITY STRATEGY 1: I will become you
    - UNITY STRATEGY 2: You will become me
    - Both strategies eventually cause rebellion; they backfire because we cannot fully eradicate ourselves or the other and suppression is unsustainable. 

  • Consider the relationship as a distinct entity: 'The Relationship Space'; "Triality"
    - The relationship is what it is; in it's wholeness
    - You and the other are distinct and whole
    - You and the other each have a perspective on 'what the relationship is'; and it is what it is.
    - Each time you create 2 (come into relationship), a third is created (the relationship space)... from this perspective we can always get 'a little bit wider'... a little bit wider takes us from going round in circles to movement, expansion and flow.
    - Becoming aware of the relationship space makes it distinct (becoming something)
    - This allows us to relate without compromise and retain our wholeness (if a system is compromised it means it's not working properly)

Let Me Help You

If you're experience conflict in your life and would like to experience some powerful 1:1 work to support you in finding your harmony and feeling peaceful and free then get in touch and let's have a chat about some 1:1 sessions with me

NPA Mastery

If you are interested in finding out how you can work with people 1:1 in powerful resistance-free ways, then take a look at our NPA Mastery Programme.


Episode 46 Looks at boundaries, which is a source of relational conflict LISTEN HERE

Episode 8 focuses on communication which supports conflict-free relationships LISTEN HERE


For in-depth training on how to live the resistance-free way, find out more and jump in to The NPA Process: Advanced Training 

Click image to get The NPA Process Sheet for free 👆🏻

1:1 Sessions with Joel 👆🏻


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