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How To Get Your Needs Met (And Feel OK About It) | BABH S1Ep79

season 1 Apr 06, 2021

EPISODE 79: How To Get Your Needs Met (And Feel OK About It)

Do you ever feel like your needs aren't met?

On one hand you feel quietly resentful... On the other hand it feels like asking for your needs to be met or (perish the thought!) actually getting your needs met - well, somehow that brings on a sense of feeling bad or guilty!

You probably ought to have a conversation but "Ugh!!"... the thought of that just feels "Yack!"... It's probably pointless anyway right? Best struggle on... and quietly seethe... and feel bad about seething.

Oh dear my friend!
This will not do!!

If you can see yourself in this sorry scenario, I want you to know:

There IS a way round this; where you CAN get your needs met AND feel really good about it!

So let's talk: Click that play button and let's get to it!


The #LoggerHeadsToLoverHearts 5 Day Challenge

Are you at loggerheads with a partner, spouse, parent, child, sibling, friend or colleague?Join the challenge and free the logjam. Break the cycle of frustration and feel the relief of forward movement again!

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NOTES:

Episode Bullet Points:

  • Thinking in terms of 'selfishness'
    - Limited resources mindset
    - Winners & losers mindset
    - Battle of the balance sheet
    - Someone has to be the victim
    - Approaching conversations with a 'what am I taking?' mindset
    - Everyone feels bad
    - Approaching conversations feeling bad has bad outcomes

  • Thinking in terms of 'systems'
    - Systems can be any relationship; intimate partners, friendships, families, businesses etc
    - You are a part of the system
    - What effects any part of the system effects the whole system
    - What's good for any part of the system is good for the whole system
    - Approach conversations with a 'What does the system need' mindset
    - Be open to what other parts of the system need (in a way which doesn't compromise your own needs)
    - Navigate and negotiate with everyone looking at the needs of the system and its parts
    - A win-win scenario
    - Have and 'trial and evolve' mindset
     
    Great Questions To Ask Yourself

    How does NOT getting my needs met IMPAIR the system?
    How does getting my needs met STRENGTHEN the system?


Let Me Help You

If you're experience disempowerment in your life and would like to experience some powerful 1:1 work to support you in finding your harmony and feeling peaceful and free then get in touch and let's have a chat about some 1:1 sessions with me

NPA Mastery

If you are interested in finding out how you can work with people 1:1 in powerful resistance-free ways, then take a look at our NPA Mastery Programme or email me for a chat via [email protected].


RELATED EPISODES

Episode 74 Lays out the dualistic thinking and a new relational model in detail LISTEN HERE

Episode 78 If you find yourself going round in circles LISTEN HERE

Episode 75 When YOU are the system with parts at war LISTEN HERE


RELATED LINKS:

For in-depth training on how to live the resistance-free way, find out more and jump in to The NPA Process: Advanced Training 


Click image to get The NPA Process Sheet for free 👆🏻


1:1 Sessions with Joel 👆🏻

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